Gift Registry Cards (or not!) in Your Invitations

There is a lot of controversy as to whether or not the bridal couple should include specific store registry cards within their wedding invitations.

Etiquette advisors are in agreement that including such little cards is rude. Their main argument is that it is rude to expect anything like a gift - the intention is to invite guests who will help you celebrate - not set up your home with items from a local department store.

The people who find it rude are not saying not to register, they are insisting rather, that once the couple is registered, the mother of the bride and maid of honour are responsible to spread the word.

Bridal shower invitations are different - the whole purpose is to 'shower' the couple with gifts.

In my experience, and having just been involved in two family weddings in the past year, setting up a registry can play double duty: the registry is set up for both the shower and the wedding gifts.

Getting back as to whether to include them in your wedding invitations: in my personal opinion, it is not rude at all. People bring gifts to a wedding. It is as simple as that.

There is also debate as to whether or not to place the registry information directly on the invitations themselves. I would suggest that that may be a little tacky - keep the invites separate.

Registries make it easy for busy people to purchase gifts that the couple will actually use and want and use: it keeps the couple from receiving gifts they wont't use, and from receiving duplicates.

When my sister married, it was fun having our girls pick items off the list they would like to give her. It included them in the shopping, and they were excited to wrap their gift and then hand it to her. Because I am close with my sister, I gave her a sentimental gift wrapped in the towels that were on her list and tied a big bow around it. So being creative and adding your own style to an item on the registry at the same time can certainly work out for the positive.

In reality, your guests are busy people, and I will assume that most people appreciate some guidance in this area.

I would also like to think that gift-giving eventually comes around. While we all have varying budgets, however you choose to give or receive a gift, should be done so wholeheartedly.

Plus, zapping the items in the store is fun! :)